The Enemy Within
Isn’t it funny how we are our own worst enemy, we have that voice inside our head that thinks it is protecting us. However when we talk to ourselves it is typical human nature to be critical, unforgiving, harsh, aggressive. Our social conditioning and life experiences have led us to believe that if we are self-critical we are preventing the risk of failure, embarrassment, mistakes, ridicule etc so what we do is tell our selves things like ” you could do better, you’re not good enough, they are going to laugh at you” and so on.
We should be our own best friend!
Every negative message that we give to ourselves effectively reinforces those negative belief systems and we start to believe what society has already told us. If you were supporting your best friend you wouldn’t tell them such negative things you would put your arm around their shoulder tell them ” you’re doing a great job, people want you to do well, you are good enough, you are going to succeed” and so forth. Most people find it easy to compliment and praise their friends and colleagues but when it comes to themselves they are afraid to expect the best just in case they get disappointed.
The human brain is a magnificent organism that has evolved way beyond that of any other species on this planet and one key reason for the success of mankind is the ability to evaluate, analyse predict to see around corners so to speak in order to prepare to fight, flyaway or freeze. This ability has ensured our status and control of planet Earth, however there is a flaw with this technique our brain doesn’t differentiate between a real threat and a perceived threat. Our primordial response system triggers the fight or flight response from just thinking about a fear, which means that the amygdala an almond shaped part of the brain prevents the hippocampus from sending messages to the frontal cortex, this is why when people are under stress they typically state that they cannot think straight. Adrenaline is released which makes the heart beat faster, the blood rushes from the stomach to the vital organs and basic natural processes such as T-cell production etc is put on hold. This is why many health-related problems are associated with stress. Every time we criticise ourselves, worry about situations or run negative stories in our mind we activate this primordial response and put whole-body through unnecessary stress and ultimately damage our health. When we operate in this way the world can be a daunting place, it can cause depression and develop limiting beliefs and this ultimately creates the world that we see.
There is another way
If someone told you to go and look into a field and see how many weeds you could see it is likely that you would only observe weeds, however if they told you to look in that same field and to see how many flowers you could find you would probably mainly see the flowers. It is the same field but you will be looking at it in a very different way. This principle applies to how you look at your world; the words, thoughts and feelings that you hold determine what you look for and therefore what you see. We can catch our thoughts and challenge them. If you have a bad feeling this means you will have had a thought proceeding that feeling, catch the thought and ask yourself ” is this thought any good for me?”, ” Is it serving any purpose?”, “Can I prove what I am thinking?”, “If I do prove what I’m thinking is right can I change it?” Nine times out of ten the negative thoughts are usually not serving any purpose with the exception of preparing ourselves not to expect too much and in reality we should expect the best and be prepared for the occasional disappointment. Isn’t it better to go through life expecting the best? If you decide that the thought is not serving any purpose or if the situation cannot be changed then it is wise to allow yourself to let the negative thought go. You will be amazed at the impact this process can have on your thinking and ultimately the way you see the world. You will begin to see the flowers!
For those of you who find it difficult to let go of negative thinking EFT is a highly effective way to tackle this and it may be worth searching on Google for the numerous success stories which outline the effectiveness of EFT. Or seek out a qualified practitioner such as myself to teach you how to use this life changing technique.